s i x p e g s

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B I T C H

with 71 comments


What do you people think about girls who fall for guys with girlfriends?
For me, I think it is perfectly normal and fine.
Because anyone can fall in love with anybody else.
But what do you think of girls who fall for attached men,
and go ahead and show her affections through her actions?
Not keeping her distance, and probably hoping that one day,
her affections will be reciprocated?

Do you think it is justified to call her a Bitch?

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Written by SIXPEGS

June 5, 2008 at 1:35 pm

Posted in Uncategorized

71 Responses

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  1. No. Not a bitch. Feelings cant be contolled. But.. since she know that the guy is attached i think she should keep a distance. But then again.. if she thinks that she can do a better job of being the better gf, then maybe her feelings might be reciprocated one day! Thats what i think lah.. (:

    This has something to do with u?

    Pegslover

    June 5, 2008 at 2:06 pm

  2. a lot of times, i noticed its the male side giving the wrong idea to the female hence her persistent ways in showing affections and not keeping a distance.

    if all matters were cleared, then yes i certainly think its perfectly fine to name call the girl.

    happening to u? u need help in names calling?

    Ching

    June 5, 2008 at 2:10 pm

  3. i agree with part 1… coz i guess emotions cannot be controlled as much as we want to, sadly.

    but it doesn’t mean that the girl shouldn’t TRY to control her feelings… she can choose to walk away but yet if she chooses to continue letting herself fall for the attached guy AND make her darn dirty moves, then i call these shameless girls whatever names i deem fit.

    and simply coz they deserve it.

    ‘fighting for own happiness’ does NOT give them any right to take away other people’s happiness.

    monochrome rainbow

    June 5, 2008 at 2:19 pm

  4. hugs girl! :)

    monochrome rainbow

    June 5, 2008 at 2:20 pm

  5. Love can turn a person into a monster so to me it depends on what the girl does in winning the guy over before she can be named a bitch. Sometimes its the guy who’s a jerk that dumps his previous gf for his new love so you can’t exactly blame the third party =)

    kerstinz

    June 5, 2008 at 2:25 pm

  6. what if someone did that to your husband. not so nice on the receiving end now yeah.

    xoxo

    June 5, 2008 at 2:38 pm

  7. its true that feeling cant be controlled but knowing that the guy is attached and she “cant control” and is constantly showing her affection? i will say only a SLUT will do that la.. bitch is too polite on her..

    sandseastars

    June 5, 2008 at 2:49 pm

  8. a person who does this…is either a emotional screwball who cannot keep his/her emotions in check over moral actions. Or a self-centered individual who thinks he/she is better than everyone else and should get whatever they want. OR a person with fetish for being a third party.
    so for name calling i think siao lang , self-centred or pian tai should fit the bill.
    actually you don’t really need any justification to name call wan lah. Half the time people name call others with words that don’t have any relation to the situation whatsoever one what.As long as it comes out with enough force and aggression it would be considered insulting.
    With enough aggression and emotion, calling a person Gao Lat would have the same upsetting effects as calling her a Bitch.

    AvidPicViewer

    June 5, 2008 at 2:53 pm

  9. yes she is a bitch thru and thru. u kno wat the sad part is? there are plenty of such girls ard, i swear. i dunno wat is a better term for them, desperados, bitches or sl*ts.

    yea, i hate them.

    kelly

    June 5, 2008 at 2:55 pm

  10. to xoxo,
    i tink married and attached are two quite separate cases liao.

    married is a whole different level coz there’s the bounded issue of commitment & faithfulness.

    -sigh-

    monochrome rainbow

    June 5, 2008 at 3:05 pm

  11. So whenever you think you can actually be a better girlfriend, then you can attempt to steal another girl’s boyfriend? Then what is the difference between stealing another person’s husband? IF you think you can be a much better WIFE. If you’re saying marriage takes more commitment and faith, are you saying a relationship allows you to put in less commitment, trust and faith?

    But I really have to agree, being a girl, sometimes, it’s the men who might have done things to lead the girl on. And I’m not penalizing the girls in this scenario. The men are to be blamed to paint a nice picture that the girls might want to be part of.

    Know what? I think it takes two hands to clap.
    I think that is the most essential part in determining whether she is a bitch. But seriously, she should learn how to keep her distance and respect herself and that guy’s other half – who is also yet another girl like her.

    sixpegs

    June 5, 2008 at 3:41 pm

  12. what if it’s the guy who keep looking for the girl himself. and claimed tt he doesnt love his own gf anymore, that its the gf who refused to let go of the already-dead relationship, claimed that he really love her and wants her to be his, wants to see her by his side every morning he wakes up, wants to marry her, be her everything and her to be his everything.

    trust me, there are this type of guys ard. as much as there are the type of girl u mentioned ard.

    but i believe sw does not fall into the above category.

    who is that bitch?

    i will help u to da xiao ren!

    Sindy

    June 5, 2008 at 3:56 pm

  13. I think he should end the previous relationship before starting on another one. If not then it’s really irresponsible also. Both girls suffer.

    sixpegs

    June 5, 2008 at 4:10 pm

  14. hi pegs, i do experience betrayal! yet i’m still v willing to let him repent & now we are married and preparing for my customary this yr.

    i do agree at time are guys who cant resist when gals start showing affections.

    on my part, i’m always on my studies and work, and only have time for him during weekends…as his working hrs are not flexible, he only has his off during weekdays. so he hang out with his frens and got to knw this BITCH who started showing his affections where she clearly knew he will nv leave me for her…yet they started behind my back.

    well…i knw found out when they not longer together. its hard for me of course, but i love him still….=)

    when things happened, it takes 2 hands to clap

    aly

    June 5, 2008 at 4:27 pm

  15. It’s a guy’s responsibility to draw a clear line to other girls when we are already committed to a certain girl(regardless of being legally married or not). Commitment , trust and faith is not set down on a piece of paper(marriage certificate). So the only difference regarding this issue between married couples and non-married couples would be the extent of damage done to the involving parties.

    Guys being the insensitive creatures we are, would naturally be appreciative of any form of ego-stroking attention we get from the opposite sex even though we are attached. I guess its true to say sometimes we are basking in our androgen filled male egos to notice that we are giving off the wrong signals to other girls and making our gfs/wives upset.

    But as you said, in this kinda situations, its all about respect. The girl must respect that the guy is attached to another girl. The guy must respect the fact that he is with his gf/wife already. And the gf/wife must respect….ermm…her parents?

    RESPEKT!

    AvidPicViewer

    June 5, 2008 at 4:39 pm

  16. I think if a girl knows that a guy is attached she should at least be wise enough to keep her distance, in the case if the guy does nothing to encourage it. True, feelings cant be controlled, but trying to get someone’s else bf by thinking that one will make a better girlfriend is not justified. Firstly, the guy chose to be with the other girl in the first place. Second, better is objective, only the guy and girl in the relationship will know what better is to them. I think if a girl knows someone to be attached but has feelings for him, should just keep it safe by being purely friends instead of doing all sorts of things to try to get that guy. Keep a distance, if not, yeah, a bitch is underrated as a term for her.

    yves

    June 5, 2008 at 4:45 pm

  17. yeah, i totally agree with what Sindy said.

    weiliang

    June 5, 2008 at 6:09 pm

  18. hey pegs, juz a silent reader here who wants to share my 2cents worth. =)

    i personally think it does not matter whether that girl is a bitch or not…but it’s more important for you not to be affected by her, especially with your miumiu going off so soon, and for so long.

    in the end, it is about you trusting him and vice versa, because there can be so many third parties to come. can’t be helped, when both of you are so eligible and attractive! =)

    lizzie

    June 5, 2008 at 6:23 pm

  19. if the girl totally ‘song shang men’ that kind.. then jus call her names lo. i’m good at that. hahaha!!

    if the guy like sending wrong signals.. the gf can also really think thru if this guy’s worth it. or he’s jus ‘lost’ for a moment.

    jus hope this is not happening to u. =)

    -siaowen-

    June 5, 2008 at 9:02 pm

  20. i was once a 3rd party. the guy didnt mentioned him having a girlfriend at the start.
    and then when he did he claimed they were hitting a rough patch and he dont think they’ll end up back together again.
    he continued to lead me on meanwhile, and doesnt talk much about this ‘ex-girlfriend’ of his. and then one day he told me he doesnt love me, and that things got to end bcos he still loves his girlfriend alot.
    it hurts a hell lot. if he’d never meant to be serious at the start, HE SHOULD NOT HAVE LED ANOTHER ON. not even a tiny bit.
    to others, i might have looked like a slut. i stuck with a guy who was already attached.
    but i was never aware of the full picture. granted, i am equally at fault for never clarifying when i should have, but i think i’d gotten my punishment already. the ugly way things ended and the subsequent heartbreak was tormenting.

    guys shouldnt lead other girls on if they have a girlfriend. never ever EVER.

    guys shouldnt think that being a master player is cool. IT REALLY IS NOT.

    and i’ve also learnt that while it is much easier to blame a guy for leading me on, i must face up to the fact that maybe my desires to be loved had made me chose to remain blinded to many things i should have clarified and stopped.

    so, girls who realise or even suspect they’re the 3rd party in a relationship should really, really stop what they’re doing and clarify with the guy.
    dont choose to be led on just bcos you think this will make him like u more n like her less.

    this is not how it works. dont be stupid, bcos you’ll just end up with a broken heart.

    blah

    June 5, 2008 at 9:43 pm

  21. It is easier for a guy to fall for a girl with boyfriend, if he doesnt know she got a boyfriend.
    Therefore, its the same for both genders, becoz I believe ppl with love splashes their love all over…. even to their surrounding friends. Its a kind of charm, isnt it?
    But guys knows such things r not right, and they believe they can find another one.

    Earthy1983

    June 5, 2008 at 10:09 pm

  22. i really cant stand girls who flirt with guys who are attached! If I fall for an attached guy, I will mo mo de bio him from afar, and I know it’s impossible to be with him cause it’s WRONG to snatch ppl’s bf and happiness!!!!

    Aiya, got so many trees around…scared meh? hahahaha….

    fangz

    June 5, 2008 at 10:59 pm

  23. I think that’s a BITCH. this is my honest opinion.
    I mean, it’s not that she doesn’t know that he has a gf.

    BITCH!!!!!!! Haha, sorry I sound so agitated, but I just went thru that shit, that’s why.

    rR

    June 5, 2008 at 11:07 pm

  24. to me, feelings cant be helped.. after all, the whole purpose of a relationship is to try if things work out. if they dont, then part amicably i guess. otherwise why get into a r/s? why not immediately get married? but imo, it isnt right to name call.

    imagine if someone met your current bf earlier than you did, and he was with her, then you came along. if you really had feelings for him, im very sure you’d do all your could to win his heart. after all, like i said previously, relationships are about trying.

    that said, even though calling her a bitch or any other degrading denomination is wrong, it is definitely justified that the female in question who is afraid of losing her boyfriend should feel angry. and it is a given that the people who care for the girl will get angry as well.

    it is of human nature to feel rage at such an ‘atrocity’, but if you take a step back and rationalise the situation, no one is really at fault. if we were to point fingers, wouldnt everyone and everything be at fault? the guy might have given wrong signals, the third party is wrong because she is so attracted to the guy despite him being attached, and lastly the girlfriend would also be in the wrong for she didnt love properly in the guy the way he wants resulting in him straying (no matter how little). also, blame fate for letting all the people get involved in it, and blame time for letting the two girls get to know the guy at different times, otherwise it would have been a fair competition without having to feel angry over the other ‘snatching’ the guy.

    in the game of love, there is no wrongs or rights- only who gets hurt the most, and who feels the saddest in the end. what do you think?

    anyhows, i hope things are going alright for both you and miumiu! :D

    anon

    June 5, 2008 at 11:38 pm

  25. I think feelings cant be controlled but ACTIONS jolly well can be!
    If I were the girl, I would keep a distance coz I really wouldnt want someone to steal my boyfriend from me either.
    But I think there are two kinds of cheating, the emotional part and the physical part.
    Somehow, I feel that if the girl expresses her love for the guy emotionally but tells him she doesnt expect anything in return, I think its fine.
    BUT I think if she uses dirty means to try to get the guy to fall for her, then that is not love, its more of lust. And I would say both the girl and the guy are just not worth it.
    Then I would call the girl a bitch, and the guy a jerk who doesnt cherish the relationship.

    Audrey

    June 5, 2008 at 11:45 pm

  26. I hope that helped babe.
    And whatever thats happening, hopefully it’ll be sorted out soon.
    Take care :)

    Audrey

    June 5, 2008 at 11:47 pm

  27. i totally agree with Blah.

    I was once deemed as a third party. Seriously, in the first place, i nvr knew i was one. I mean, we got together after they broke up (like what he told me). We knew each other when he was alrdy attached. He was just an eyecandy.

    He and his gf were hitting a rough patch. He wanted to end his relationship with e other girl and i told him to think twice. I can feel how serious he was abt that girl. I was the one who kinda persuaded him to talk to the girl abt their problems and stuffs, asking him not to give up.

    Then, he chose to let the girl go coz he said he fell for me. I was naive and i believed he’d broken up with his gf. But what the hell, he lied. And i only found out after we broke up through his ex gf’s good friend. I feel so so so terrible. I was indeed a third party.

    I hope girls do open their eyes when they come across such men. I feel so guilty towards his ex gf.

    Mercy

    June 5, 2008 at 11:48 pm

  28. Let’s say hypothetically that this man eventually realizes he loves this “BITCH”. He loves her so much that he packs his bags, walks out the front door and left his wife.

    Ms. “BITCH” and Mr. “BASTARD” dates and eventually marries. They have kids and grandkids. They lead a fulfilling and loving life together. They die without regrets.

    Coming back to the present, would Ms. “BITCH” be wrong now to be pursuing what she thought would be her future happiness?

    After all, isn’t that what all of us are doing one way or another? In pursuit of our happiness.

    Of course, that’s just hypothetically speaking.

    In reality, what Ms. “BITCH” is doing is wrong – adjudged wrong based on religious and societal standards that are upheld and applied by people around her. Maybe Ms. “BITCH” lives by the same standards, but most likely not. In any case, what’s really right and what’s really wrong? Does that really matter at the end of ones’ life?

    I do not have an answer to that question. Yet.

    But thinking back, when I watched my grandfather on his deathbed years ago, I don’t think he was contemplating of what he did right and wrong. He was looking to hold his loved ones, perhaps one last time. The same loved ones that are a result of a lifetime’s pursuit of his happiness.

    JL

    JL

    June 6, 2008 at 12:50 am

  29. sigh i got a shock reading thru ‘aly’s only cos… hahaa that girl’s got the same name as me!

    whatever it is….it takes two hands to clap.

    and like you said peggy i seriously think those irritating guys should end one then go for another.

    not just leave den go for another…the other doesn’t work out…den come back for the proper gf etc.

    it stinks. cos… im kinda in it now. sigh.

    but trying to slap myself into reality. and the best thing is … he’s doing it to me just in time for my 21st birthday…when we were supposed to be on a getaway together!

    ha but if a man does this, to the former or the next girlfriend…or fling. he really isn’t any good man. yes there’re are temptations that cannot be resisted..but if a guy loves you enough… he cant possibly bear to put one through so much pain. period.

    glitzerati

    June 6, 2008 at 1:29 am

  30. hey dear, i hope you’re not too affected about last night… how i told you about my ex-bf and busted him when he two-timed me. i know it was my fault that i had to intrude into his privacy, but at least i knew what was going on.

    for the sake of holding onto this relationship, i just pretend that nothing is happening. yes, it takes 2 hands to clap. so i’m asking if everyone does deserve a second chance? can they make up for the wrong they have done? and is this how the story should end this way after having a 4 years relationship?

    it’s hard to make a decision on what to do. i can totally imagine you starting to point fingers and putting the blame on the parties involved… but maybe we should have given him the benefit of doubt. sometimes it’s really hard to trust someone.. i know. but what’s gonna happen come sunday?

    you know i’m in no position to tell you what to do, because you know better what you have in mind. whatever it is, you have my support and you know i do care for you (:

    chelle

    June 6, 2008 at 2:28 am

  31. hmm..interesting views anon, but i wonder if one can be so calm and rationalised when they themselves are caught in a similar situation.
    I agree with audrey that actions CAN be controlled. there is a clear line between “just hoping he would love you too” and “taking him away from his gf so that you can keep him all to yourself”.
    If the degree of your actions falls within the latter,then its wrong liao. orrrrhhhhhhh…horrrr….

    AvidPicViewer

    June 6, 2008 at 4:18 am

  32. In the end of the day, all parties involved are still going to get hurt. Regardless of the ‘other girl’, the ‘one who mislead’ or the gf.

    Feelings are funny emotions.

    One day, a girl and a guy can be platonic best friends who understand each other more than anyone else in this world, the next day the line between friendship are blurred.

    But if that girl is really rational, she should keep her distance and knows her limits. And learn to take things with pinches of salt.

    Otherwise, the term ‘bitch’ applies.

    justlikeasugar

    June 6, 2008 at 8:16 am

  33. to anon,

    “… lastly the girlfriend would also be in the wrong for she didnt love properly in the guy the way he wants resulting in him straying (no matter how little).”

    then what about the innocent gfs who love their bfs wholeheartedly and yet the a-holes still go flirting around? it’s not fair now, is it?

    DAMN YOU BITCHES!! and bastards. =(

    melancholy

    June 6, 2008 at 8:41 am

  34. wow so many comments. an issue that i constantly grapple with. i would DEF say BITCH. no qualms about that. but i silently curse the guy for not drawing lines. for gods sake all guys, pls go draw a thick solid line, not some filmsy faint dotted ones. i know of guys who do that very well and i just wish all of em r like that!

    swish

    June 6, 2008 at 10:17 am

  35. YA!! damn alot of comments.. i do agree feelings cant b controlled n if u fell in love with attached guys.. it must b that something he had that made him being attached too..
    But i would say a distance must be kept to avoid being a third party. I HATE THRID PARTY LA!! (unless u dunno he is attached at first, then he is a god damn jerk!!) Sadly i had gfs who r so foolish… n didn’t got her love reciprocate. Hurt herself badly at the end. U can confess ur feelings.. but show no movements until that guy really broke up or something.. Or else thats a bitch! But BITCHES are everywhere thou.. sadly..

    rach

    June 6, 2008 at 12:58 pm

  36. I thought it transcends the definition of ‘bitch’ and enters into a brand new (low) realm called ‘slut’.

    wY

    June 6, 2008 at 1:52 pm

  37. What if things happened? What if things just became uncontrollable and out of hands?

    What if it just becomes the way it should never be?

    What if you didnt realise it. And then, there it is, and you plunge in?

    And sometimes, some people do not want to be reciprocated. Sometimes, some people just thought they will always be there at some dark little corner.

    And sometimes they are not jealous. they struggle. and sometimes, they also lost themselves in it.

    And yes, they are bitches. No matter what. Cos they have guilt to live with for the rest of their lives. and everything, will just be any excuses to make themselves look better which no one will ever believe in.

    will there be regrets? will there be guilt? or jus someone heartless looking on coldly.

    how i know? i was once there. yeah, i was the heartless bitch, standing there.

    STing

    June 6, 2008 at 2:16 pm

  38. acutally cannot blame the girl..feeling are hard to control…no one can…what can do is force ownself not to do stupid things..but the feeling is there one…
    everything also have 2 side…without realising both you dont know what is happening one…dont try to judge thing by knowing 1 side only…maybe the guy has wrong too..not totally the girls fault..trust me..LOVE has no right or wrong…is about feeling..right or wrong is not up to others to judge…cause at the point of time others feeling is different from how ownself feel…

    Devil

    June 6, 2008 at 2:47 pm

  39. totally in the same boat as you Peggy. This girl did something bitchy (cant find a better word to use) and erupted “war” btw her and me. And she can even continue to contact my bf frequently, acting like an angel. I trust my bf, but its just frustrating to have a pest around you know. I think i understand how you feel. Its just that uneasy feeling, super irritating.

    But i believe in karma for relationships…Just ignore her. :)

    B

    June 6, 2008 at 4:24 pm

  40. i’m also a 3rd party, the guy told me at the very last min before we were about to get together. he promised he’ll settle the matter asap. though he ultimately broke up with his gf for several years, that period was really tough for me and for him. till now, i think that will be a hidden wound in me and him. if i could be given a chance, i wouldn’t have started it before he settled his past, really.

    reader

    June 6, 2008 at 5:05 pm

  41. i mean his girlfriend of several years. till now i can’t help but think he still haven’t get over her. though he always assures me, but it’s just something which can be removed so easily from my heart.

    reader

    June 6, 2008 at 5:11 pm

  42. avidpicviewer: it is of course near impossible to be so calm and collected when facing the situation. however, after the whole issue after we have learnt to move on and to forgive, perhaps we might learn to see things from this point of view.

    melancholy: by loving the guy in the way he wants him to does not mean to love him wholeheartedly by the girl’s own standards. it means to love him by his standards, and if you live up to his standards completely, i am very sure the guy will not cheat because the girl is already all that he is looking for. however, sad to say, there does not exist someone who can love the guy fully in the guy’s terms. which is why problems like these arise.

    and to the rest who vehemently opposes whatever the new girl is doing/has done: put ourselves in the shoes of the third party.. if we really have this strong sense of attraction towards the guy, we would definitely want him to be ours. will you feel so disgusted towards your own actions, then?

    like i mentioned in my previous comment, the point of relationships are to see if things work out- why else have we evolved from the traditional practice of blind marriages to the current era of dating and relationships? shouldnt everyone be given a fair chance to love before they find the one they truly want to be with and get married? that said, i must state that this is provided both parties share the same feelings. no use if its just one-sided.

    What JL has said further substantiates my point. at the end of the day, there may be different viewpoints, tongues may wag non-stop and people might have many unpleasant comments, but what matters the most is having lived life to its fullest without regrets, and knowing you could not have lived it any happier if given a chance to relive it again.

    it is of human nature to carelessly throw comments and unpleasant remarks about things and happenings which do not live up to the unwritten code of ethics. but this unspoken code is the result of society and its conformations. there is no right or wrong in life, by right. to each and everyone in different situations, a wrong thing might be right. society states that it is wrong to do this because otherwise people will look at you with disdain. but in actual fact, what one group of people may feel is atrocious might be perfectly acceptable for another group.

    many of us are the result of the expectations and mindsets that society has implanted in us. people should start living up to their own standards, for themselves, instead of living for society, afraid that the general public (who sticks by the standard set of values cos they dont have their own) may glare at them with disapproving eyes.

    anon

    June 6, 2008 at 5:28 pm

  43. I think… no actions should be allowed (to me, that is) because an attached man should never be touched by another woman whom he does not love. If your actions are like… what, kiss and hugs – I’d most probably be blowing my top at her already. Feelings CAN be controlled, I believe. That girl needs to know what she’s doing to you and your man. No, she’s not a bitch. But if she touches his dick and be all over him all the time, then she is.

    And your man should jolly well be avoiding her.

    Take care, Peggy.

    Estelle

    June 6, 2008 at 6:05 pm

  44. wah anon, you can write a book liao lea….

    but you say so much and i wonder if you’ve been through ANY of the possible scenarios.

    1) the guy should wake up his blardy idea and stay away from the EXTRA girl. and NOT continue flirting just because he disclaimed that he’s just flirting. f**ku!

    2) the bastard guy should NOT lead the EXTRA girl on by entertaining her flirting ways. com’on lah, a-hole! you spare NO thought for your gf at all!! do you?? selfish retards.

    3) the EXTRA girl should keep her damn distance because it’s just not fair to the gf! what, she likes so she can take lah?! what is she?? goddess of slutty-ness?? KARMA bitch, karma ten fold for you.

    4) it’s just downright CHEAP to try to steal from someone else, even if there is such STRONG attraction which may actually just be lust. then proves the point that men can’t keep their lil bro in check.

    5) the EXTRA girl should also try to stop herself from liking him knowing he’s attached. even if canot stop herself from liking, she can jz NOT disturb people’s tranquility what. it’s not like the couple’s having problems and the gf’s crap. go find some OTHER single bastard to play with. shooooo!!

    6) and even if there may be the chance that bitch & bastard may end up together, it’s rather obvious the timing is NOT right, ain’t it? CAN’T YOU JUST BEAT IT, BITCH???!?!?!?!!

    NO ONE has the right to take away anybody’s happiness. NO ONE…!!!! damnn!

    pissed

    June 6, 2008 at 9:05 pm

  45. all’s fair in love and war, isn’t it?

    weiliang

    June 6, 2008 at 9:51 pm

  46. come to think of it.
    i had such an experience before.
    jus that the ‘bitch’ was the ex-gf of my bf at that time.
    i chose to forgive my bf and made him to tell the girl to not look up for him again. however, the ex-gf had always been the starter for our fights for the next 1 yr.

    -siaowen-

    June 6, 2008 at 11:41 pm

  47. i totally agree with e fact tat alot of such gals exist..

    personally, im in such a situation..worse still e gal has a bf herself..yet trying to be nice to my guy

    i do agree when it says it takes 2 hands to clap..but i guess guys r the ones tryin to be nice ones and dun wanna break anyone’s heart thus unconsciously continued leading them on

    im sure e gal knows my bf and i r happy tgt all along(such thing as facebook) but she jus dun have a sense of shame n continue being so affectionate..

    damn pissed when she herself gt a bf for yrs!! 4yrs!!

    jo

    June 6, 2008 at 11:49 pm

  48. Hi peggy… I enjoy reading your blog :) Between in jan and may… i tink i saw you in bkk hahaha… Anyway just passing by to say hi… Stay pretty & gorgeous ; )

    April thirteen

    June 7, 2008 at 4:03 am

  49. no point trying to justify is a bitch or not, doesn’t help anything

    owl that hoots at night

    June 7, 2008 at 4:26 am

  50. gosh i’m in the same situation w u jo!

    and the girl wants my guy to hide their “relationship” from me. so that i dont know about her and what they do.

    girls. sigh..

    swish

    June 7, 2008 at 10:36 am

  51. Hi Peggy,

    From my own experience. Thankfully I have gone through this once in my lifetime so far, it got me so emotional for a couple of months.

    We are very feminine ladies, we do not use the word bitch for all matters lies if the girl still loves his man.

    Or can she trust him, or does she feel insecure, is she happy?

    Because ultimately what matters most is that smile on your face. Not having to worry and think whether that “3rd party” takes over your place.

    Also, It a test on how much resistance or resilience the relationship can withstand and observe how your partner behaves.

    -Cheers, babe!-

    Cheryl

    June 7, 2008 at 11:32 am

  52. agrees with the first few liners (:
    but I guess alot depends on the guy too. if the guy doesnt lead her on, the girl wont be so dumb to still stay on..hoping her feelings isnt one-sided one day. :/ it does takes TWO hands to clap afterall.

    but to whom is facing this situation, be strong..! huggs*

    Noi

    June 7, 2008 at 11:48 am

  53. pissed: haha you never know. unfortunately for me, i’ve been through a couple of failed relationships and there are many reasons for each and every of them. i was once in this scenario too, and this girl came along and after a while they decided to be together. i was angry of course, but i got over it cos being angry wouldnt do anything. in less than half a year, that same guy asked me out and told me he still had feelings for me and wanted to dump that girl. too bad for him, i had already gotten over him by then.

    there were also 2 separate issues where 2 guys were attached and they very obviously hid their gfs from me. at first i did have that slight bit of feelings and nearly gave them chances. but after i found out, poof, no more talking. the first ended quite bad but a year and a half later we started talking like normal friends though not as close anymore. the latter wasnt as bad, but we kept our distances.

    there was another time it was another guy who fell for me despite knowing i was attached to this one guy i deeply love. (haha, funny how the gender roles switched; things were also much more complicated but i shall not continue)

    all i’d like to say is despite all this, you can’t really blame anyone when you’re talking about relationships. the ultimate thing is to know that you and your other half love each other deeply and trust each other wholeheartedly. that’s what is most important. in this case, even if all the girls in the world fell for your one guy, you’d still feel as secure as ever.

    btw, i think what weiliang said pretty much sums it all up. (:

    anon

    June 7, 2008 at 1:41 pm

  54. what if the third party makes it clear to the gf that she wants to win her bf’s heart. does it make it right? i mean afterall they are not married right?

    AvidPicViewer

    June 7, 2008 at 3:19 pm

  55. avidpicviewer: then isnt the ‘third party’ just being courteous and posing a fair challenge? after all if im not wrong tv shows often show these scenarios, except that its two guys chasing the girl.

    so then people, do we call this third party guy a ‘bastard’?

    anon

    June 7, 2008 at 10:03 pm

  56. i would say yes, the girl’s a bitch. in fact, much worse, a slut. i’ve been through that and up till now, i cannot bring myself to forgive or forget. the very thought of the slut makes my blood boil. she not only made advances on my bf, she made it clear to me that she wants to win him over – and she even said it is possible because “you are not yet married to each other what!”. bloody hell.i wish so hard that one day, something like that will happen to her as well – best if it happens when she’s married. before any of you girls/guys attempt to do something like that, pls think of how you would feel if you were the one being cheated on. i agree it takes two hands to clap ,but without the catalyst to being with, nothing would have happened – no one would get hurt.

    n

    June 8, 2008 at 1:26 am

  57. love is beautiful yet scary and selfish. i can love you today, love others tml. you can choose to hurt others, just to protect yourself.There is no promise in love.

    Trust and faith are your best friends in a relationship. if u love the person, commit and dont flirt with others. As you wish your partner is doing e same thing as you.

    Have you ever wonder how do u feel if you found out that your bf/gf did intimate with your best friend at your back?

    love is blind, but cant be forced. what yours is yours. I always believe in karma.

    Play your part, do the best.

    Angel or Devil is but a choice away.

    CookieMonstor

    June 8, 2008 at 1:44 am

  58. I do get myself into some sort of mess that bring me to the name of ‘bitch’. Yet things was kind of complicated too.

    I was together with this bf, whom had an ex- gf of 2-3 years(inbetween with breaks and patches). Somehow they got back into contacts and so the old flames found back some old feelings.

    They meet up together at his house which on that faithful day, my bf was supposely to meet me outside. So he stood me up and before we even offically break off, two of them had already got back together. It was complicated.

    And me being very unhappy with the ridiclious sudden break off, keep pestering on to my now, ex bf. I know I should be more sensible to let go. But part of me hated that girl for being the reason of our break off, and I was so depressed and obessed with the idea to break them off too.

    We do meet up, msn, chat on phone all secretly behind the gf back after we broke off. During this period he sort of realized that he still have some feelings to me, and tell me he still loves me and felt sorry and guilty for doing me wrong in the past.

    Soon after the gf discovered all this, he and me had a big fight over her and we cutted off contacts.

    I din even know who’s the actual third party/bitch in this picture. But now this matter had already come to 3 years.. and the amaze thing is both of them are still together for 3 years already.

    I realized I wasn’t just meant to be there in the first place.

    Reader-

    June 8, 2008 at 1:56 am

  59. guess it all depends on the situation?
    but i always believe we have the freedom to love
    yet we have the responsibility to control our love whenever possible
    one should never pursue his/her love at the expense of breaking up a r/s or marriage…

    e

    June 8, 2008 at 11:30 am

  60. how about a attached girl who fall for another guy (single). is she justified to call as bitch as well?

    theone

    June 8, 2008 at 11:44 am

  61. To Reader,

    neither you and his current gf are bitch/slut. That ex of yours is a bastard, he tried to two-timer. you should feel happy that you did a correct decision by letting go.

    I always believe end one relationship before start another. be fair to all parties and stop being selfish by hurting others to protect himself/herself.

    CookieMonstor

    June 8, 2008 at 2:10 pm

  62. everybody must be guided by some morals and principles. the basic is (like some readers have already mentioned “one should never pursue his/her love at the expense of breaking up a r/s or marriage”.

    my view – whatever scenario, whether u dont know if the guy oredi has a gf/wife, or the guy has no more feelings for his current gf…etc. once i know i’m the 3rd party, i’ll back off. however much i love him, i’ll still back off.

    dear peggy, i hope u are not facing any problem.

    Sophia

    June 8, 2008 at 2:45 pm

  63. Peggy

    I have fallen for a man…whom later I realized he is engaged and about to get married. It is the aftermath that is torturing…and I decided to nip it in the bud even though he asked for lunch and meetings still…as friends…friends?

    I’ve thought..one fine day I’m gonna be someone’s gf/ fiancee/ wife and I would not want any girls to hit on my man…and so, yeap…do not do onto others on what you would not want others to do onto you.

    Cheers peggy =)

    wendy

    June 8, 2008 at 3:17 pm

  64. There are so many comments.
    And I really believe that every single person out there got their own little secret story they need to share. I really feel for some of those who fell for the wrong person, there were happy endings, there were sad endings as well.
    I think it’s really hard to see whats right or wrong in a relationship. Probably what weiliang said is right, all’s fair in love and war. No rights and wrongs. No fair or unfair.
    I do believe in Karma. So don’t do onto others what you don’t want others to do to you, I agree on that, Wendy.

    All those who are concerned with me, thank you very much but I’m doing okay already. I ran into some problems but I chose to believe that all that I’ve seen is just a misunderstanding. Miumiu and I are fine. And I thank you very much for your concern. Oh btw, that “bitch” I was talking about reads my blog. And no way I’m gonna talk to her again. Theres a limit to my generosity.

    sixpegs

    June 8, 2008 at 3:34 pm

  65. you go girl! =p

    .joEy (ho) ³ .

    June 9, 2008 at 1:02 am

  66. Yeah i agree it depends on the relationship in question. Sometimes, gfs claim to be angry when these “bitches” come along but they themselves are not faithful to the relationship. So it depends. Alot of people i know have double standards when it comes to their own behaviour and their SO (significant other’s) behaviour. If you havent been guarding ur relationship well, you too have a part to play, though indirect and a lesser part. Though i agree it takes the other two to clap as well.

    vick

    June 10, 2008 at 5:21 am

  67. woolalah.

    ummms. you are right man! its alrite for girls to fall for guys with gfs. but she is a bitch when she fall for attached men..

    to me, never touch an attached man! i dun underdstand y girls wanna bring themselves to a complicated situation where she breaks off other family, and got herself into the title of being ‘third-party’…

    pegs. if girls like this to be called as bitch. i tink much worst is when a husband gets himself a mistress.

    wat do u tink?

    round it up! GIRLS BEHAVE YOURSELF. MARRIED MEN TOO!

    yay~

    Shiyuan

    June 10, 2008 at 5:37 pm

  68. Hi, I’m just a reader of your blog. recently this girl sent this entry link to my good friend indirectly calling her a bitch. shocking to know she went to this extreme measure even after cursing my good friend’s sick father that he’s dying soon and that’s karma. it happens when this girl’s ex bf supposedly broke up with her to chase after my friend. they got together and in between this girl try all ways to get back with him. well, she succeeded and they patch up. but she still use all ways to hurt or humiliate my friend. In this case, the guy did nothing to stop all these, in fact cowardly hide away from this situation. No offense to your entry but just wana do justices to my friend.

    lis

    June 10, 2008 at 10:43 pm

  69. Wow, it’s just so irony that “someone”‘s friend came here to post on such a comment. Well, it is just so unfortunately that i am the friend of the girl who sent this entry to your “friend”. Do you actually know the full story or you only listen to that supposedly pathetic story of hers?

    First, did she really indirectly call her a bitch? Can’t my friend just paste this link to her to show her how people got hurt when this kind of things happen and maybe let her feel a tiny bit of what she had been through? Does this mean my friend is calling your friend a bitch or is it because of guilty heart that is why you both thought so?

    Secondly, She did not curse your friend’s sick father. Since long time ago, she had been calling her bf as her no.1. I don’t it is pure coincidental or someone copy who.

    Thirdly, it’s your friend who approach her bf in the first place even knowing of her existence! Even go to the extent of getting the bf’s number from another friend and keep smsing him saying it’s project and chat on msn and even keep asking him out even after he rejected a few times. During that period of time, didn’t she had a bf too? Why didn’t she gave her attention to her bf but instead to another person’s bf?

    Lastly, I would like to clarify that it’s the bf realise that my friend was the one he loved most that is why he went back to her. My friend never once beg him to go back and maybe you can check clearly whether who is the ONE who beg the bf to go back to “her” by sending those smses. She knows it clearly herself. Please make this clear and stop accusing my friend and sending those childish msg to her and please stop pestering them. Thank you very much.

    emily

    June 16, 2008 at 11:01 pm

  70. perhaps u should check out from tht guy. cause we, as her coursemates seen her smses of how the guy went after her and pester her during lessons.

    hui

    June 19, 2008 at 11:11 pm

  71. hey peeps, i guess all the a/m posts clearly shows that it’s wrong for a girl to not keep a distance from guys who are attached. that’s what we label them as sluts. loose indeed. Well obviously guys who continue playing wif fire, might juz be making full use of the girl, dumping them aft they did “it”. Tht is truly bastard. But as the saying goes ‘ nan ren bu ai nu ren bu ai’ i wonder who will care being called a bastard afterall. nevertheless guys are juz intelligent bastards and girls being played are simply________.

    shirz

    June 21, 2008 at 1:27 am


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